Places I've Slept:
Estes Park, CO
a few places in Denver
Best Purchase: My grey ankle boot fer sure
Best Gift: My blackberry
Best Gift -- A necklace I received from India
Best Book:The Golden Compass Trilogy, and In a Queer Place and Time
Best Movie: X Files on DVD
Best Album: KBCO Studio C vol 20
Best Website: Twitter which, also happens to be the worst, or nataliedee so funny
Best Object: animate: My cat Hortense, inanimate-prolly my boots again
Best Transportation: Subaru Outback, you can sleep in it too
Best Meal: hmmm...indian food, or these delicious egg plant wroll-ups from the Tea House
Best Social Space: The Rock Inn, or the Med
Best Personal Space: Behind my house in the field clear view of Longs
Best Achievement: Three surgeries in six months and still being alive and in school and not having effed everything up in my life because of it
Life Additions: moving in with my gentleman caller. living in a cabin, our dog Indigo, my cat Hortense, a new MacBook, Twitter, prolly a few pounds, a newfound love for x-files, eating healthier, snow boots, hiking pants, long underwear, a humidifier, the desire to never bear children, candles, and some really great days in the subaru
Sunday, January 4, 2009
argh-I'm always behind L Word Spoiler alert
In my disconnection from the world writing a paper on public deliberation, applying for the PhD program etc...I totally missed out on the whole L Word Jenny gets killed thing! OMG I must be the last person to know-seriously! So who did it? I think Niki or suicide didn't we all know Jenny's life would end tragically-oh the Opelia-esque poetry of it all.
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Friday, January 2, 2009
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
two new "reality" shows
Ok so I shouldn't say these "reality" shows are new but new-ish to me. I also just find "reality" t.v. to be so not real and also so addictive. I end up really really getting addicted to the worst things and these are two of them. And yes I should be finishing my paper-but I needed a wittle break!
First Momma's Boys
The latest girl eliminated totally looks like my old college roommate, which is really funny. They kind of have the same personality, loving animals not really wanting children, being blond and a bit meek. But the show really sucks, one of the mothers is overtly racist and doesn't want her son interracially mixing with a woman of color. And most of the women of color have been eliminated. Many of the girls are unnaturally blonde with unnaturally large breasticles. And ugh do we really need another dating show where boys choose girls that they later dismiss and re-choose someone else.
Also...
Secret Lives of Women
This show actually bothers me because it really puts certain specific women on display for the voyeuristic pleasure of others and most likely for men. And it makes these women seem so exotic when most people have "secrets" and it turns the secret possessors into the others and the rest of us into the norm. I don't like the implications of such displays. Argh.
Also saw a hilarious commercial for Trojan Vibrating Touch-yes it was a real commercial.
First Momma's Boys
The latest girl eliminated totally looks like my old college roommate, which is really funny. They kind of have the same personality, loving animals not really wanting children, being blond and a bit meek. But the show really sucks, one of the mothers is overtly racist and doesn't want her son interracially mixing with a woman of color. And most of the women of color have been eliminated. Many of the girls are unnaturally blonde with unnaturally large breasticles. And ugh do we really need another dating show where boys choose girls that they later dismiss and re-choose someone else.
Also...
Secret Lives of Women
This show actually bothers me because it really puts certain specific women on display for the voyeuristic pleasure of others and most likely for men. And it makes these women seem so exotic when most people have "secrets" and it turns the secret possessors into the others and the rest of us into the norm. I don't like the implications of such displays. Argh.
Also saw a hilarious commercial for Trojan Vibrating Touch-yes it was a real commercial.
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Hospitals
Warning: If you are easily sickened maybe you should not read this!
==
Today I had to go to the emergency room. First of all this is always a gloomy and expensive situation but the Estes Park ER is really quite dismal. While most of the people are friendly enough they didn't give me my own room-which when you go because you may have a case of giardia is not a pretty picture. The nurse who is a dude which is totally fine, I just didn't want to give the impression the nurse was female as is assumed of the profession nurse, fixes my I.V. digging around in my vein to get my blood out for tests and such. I have had a lot of blood taken and several I.V's put in-but this one was extremely painful still hurting even tonight. And I have a nurse in training watching the whole thing go down-Neat. It's cool you can watch me be sick and miserable. When the nurse tells me to stick out my tongue he makes a sort of "eww" sound and says, "That looks bad, like a helamonster dried out in the desert." I take that to be a bad thing. But what is to be expected when I haven't been able to drink much of anything for a week? Dry helamonster it is. It took three bags of fluid to rehydrate me to the point that I actually had to pee.
But worst of all the ER doc (who I have seen before and is a total a-hole) doesn't even really believe me when I am telling him my symptoms. "So you think this is like a diarrhea and vomiting thing then." I'm like well I'm not the doctor but since those are my symptoms I'm gonna have to say yes. I don't say this, but I do say yes I believe this is what I am experiencing. I explain to him that I am extremely dehydrated because this has been going on for a week and I can't keep anything down that that is why I came in. I feel I have to justify myself to him-justify the fact that I am ill. "And this isn't related to your endometriosis or interstitial cystitis?" "well it feels nothing like the pain or symptoms that come along with either of those issues so no." "And still there is no way you could be pregnant?" ARGH! "No," I respond, but my anger is muted by the fact that I am on anti-nausea medication. "So we can just give you some anti-nausea medication to take home and you can hydrate orally?" "If I can keep it down, I threw up all my medicine this morning." I don't actually say this I just think it and nod and smile. I want to punch him in the face for not believing me, want to explain to him that I would not go on this long painful venture to see his stupid ass if I didn't have too. But I nod and smile-home is really where I should be anyway-much more comfortable and he won't be there.
Lastly they made me take stool sample cups home to collect specimens. Awesome! I asked if they would give me some gloves, I change diapers for a living and I don't go anywhere near those kids' poop without them, why would I go that close to my own.
At least they are remodeling so if I ever have to go back it won't suck quite as much.
==
Today I had to go to the emergency room. First of all this is always a gloomy and expensive situation but the Estes Park ER is really quite dismal. While most of the people are friendly enough they didn't give me my own room-which when you go because you may have a case of giardia is not a pretty picture. The nurse who is a dude which is totally fine, I just didn't want to give the impression the nurse was female as is assumed of the profession nurse, fixes my I.V. digging around in my vein to get my blood out for tests and such. I have had a lot of blood taken and several I.V's put in-but this one was extremely painful still hurting even tonight. And I have a nurse in training watching the whole thing go down-Neat. It's cool you can watch me be sick and miserable. When the nurse tells me to stick out my tongue he makes a sort of "eww" sound and says, "That looks bad, like a helamonster dried out in the desert." I take that to be a bad thing. But what is to be expected when I haven't been able to drink much of anything for a week? Dry helamonster it is. It took three bags of fluid to rehydrate me to the point that I actually had to pee.
But worst of all the ER doc (who I have seen before and is a total a-hole) doesn't even really believe me when I am telling him my symptoms. "So you think this is like a diarrhea and vomiting thing then." I'm like well I'm not the doctor but since those are my symptoms I'm gonna have to say yes. I don't say this, but I do say yes I believe this is what I am experiencing. I explain to him that I am extremely dehydrated because this has been going on for a week and I can't keep anything down that that is why I came in. I feel I have to justify myself to him-justify the fact that I am ill. "And this isn't related to your endometriosis or interstitial cystitis?" "well it feels nothing like the pain or symptoms that come along with either of those issues so no." "And still there is no way you could be pregnant?" ARGH! "No," I respond, but my anger is muted by the fact that I am on anti-nausea medication. "So we can just give you some anti-nausea medication to take home and you can hydrate orally?" "If I can keep it down, I threw up all my medicine this morning." I don't actually say this I just think it and nod and smile. I want to punch him in the face for not believing me, want to explain to him that I would not go on this long painful venture to see his stupid ass if I didn't have too. But I nod and smile-home is really where I should be anyway-much more comfortable and he won't be there.
Lastly they made me take stool sample cups home to collect specimens. Awesome! I asked if they would give me some gloves, I change diapers for a living and I don't go anywhere near those kids' poop without them, why would I go that close to my own.
At least they are remodeling so if I ever have to go back it won't suck quite as much.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
The reason i love the x files
so this is going to be a short post I don't really have the time to devote to it like I should but i want to get the ideas out there because they are important even if they are not new.
Last weekend I watched "X-Files: I Want to Believe," followed by the "Revelations" (yeah wrong order I know.) But I discovered this theme which I am sure was the intent about where T/truth/s lie (pun intended.) Since I never watched several episodes in a row of the show when it was on prime time and now it's on a bit late and scary for me to watch it too often watching them like this gave me a much different impression of the show.
As most people probably knew but I had never really caught on to, Dana Scully is the scientific skeptic of the whole operation-although I do remember her being fairly convinced during some episodes that paranormal phenomenon could exist. Scully, who especially in earlier episodes is reminiscent of the dearly beloved,Clarice Starling. While attractive, her clothing and hair leave a lot open for ways to have her body be read. She is a professional, wearing less mkeup, with androgynous hair except for the fluffy bangs which seemed more a way to hide her sex appeal then flatter it. Yet she is constantly (hetero)sexualized by the predators, psychics, killers, and even by Mulder, who questions her abilities at first because of her gender performance. What Scully really does for the show however, is provide the skeptic, the "I want to believe" but character, In her line of work she believes everything must posess a scientific empirical reason for its occurrence. Thus, even when faced with a situation with no possible scientific explanation, she is still reluctant to buy Mulder's belief that the explanation comes from the realm of the paranormal.
Enter Fox Mulder, the guy who believes anything and everything is possible and many things are unexplained. He is the man who offers up the possibility that not only do things happen out of the ordinary all the time but he believes them based on data which is primarily interview and narrative. He listens to the teller of the anomalous tale and asks Scully to listen and try to believe because the people doing the telling believe it to be true. This is really quite deep.
Onto talking about my favorite episode seen thus far, "Modern Day Prometheus." Talk about camp. Cher, queer characters, black and white, and the modern day Frankenstein. What could be better. More to come on this. However, this has been a lot of what I think about.
I also feel this ties in quite nicely to shifting identities of queerness and illness...more to come there too.
--
Last weekend I watched "X-Files: I Want to Believe," followed by the "Revelations" (yeah wrong order I know.) But I discovered this theme which I am sure was the intent about where T/truth/s lie (pun intended.) Since I never watched several episodes in a row of the show when it was on prime time and now it's on a bit late and scary for me to watch it too often watching them like this gave me a much different impression of the show.
As most people probably knew but I had never really caught on to, Dana Scully is the scientific skeptic of the whole operation-although I do remember her being fairly convinced during some episodes that paranormal phenomenon could exist. Scully, who especially in earlier episodes is reminiscent of the dearly beloved,Clarice Starling. While attractive, her clothing and hair leave a lot open for ways to have her body be read. She is a professional, wearing less mkeup, with androgynous hair except for the fluffy bangs which seemed more a way to hide her sex appeal then flatter it. Yet she is constantly (hetero)sexualized by the predators, psychics, killers, and even by Mulder, who questions her abilities at first because of her gender performance. What Scully really does for the show however, is provide the skeptic, the "I want to believe" but character, In her line of work she believes everything must posess a scientific empirical reason for its occurrence. Thus, even when faced with a situation with no possible scientific explanation, she is still reluctant to buy Mulder's belief that the explanation comes from the realm of the paranormal.
Enter Fox Mulder, the guy who believes anything and everything is possible and many things are unexplained. He is the man who offers up the possibility that not only do things happen out of the ordinary all the time but he believes them based on data which is primarily interview and narrative. He listens to the teller of the anomalous tale and asks Scully to listen and try to believe because the people doing the telling believe it to be true. This is really quite deep.
Onto talking about my favorite episode seen thus far, "Modern Day Prometheus." Talk about camp. Cher, queer characters, black and white, and the modern day Frankenstein. What could be better. More to come on this. However, this has been a lot of what I think about.
I also feel this ties in quite nicely to shifting identities of queerness and illness...more to come there too.
--
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