Week 7 breathing and music...last country song promise

A very lovely friend made me a "Forget You" C.D and I love, love, love it!!! :-)

So, this is one of the songs from it and yes, it is a sappy country song. And I promise it is the last one, but I like it. It's empowering...not just angry and I think it describes the place I am at right now. I like it also because it is hopeful...like me. Le sigh. I recently read this blog post and I thought it said something really smart: (to paraphrase) It isn't that the breakup is still so painful or killing me, but it is the fact that I had these plans made for my life and what it would like and now they are totally changed. "i can't keep trying to maintain this balance of dealing with the heartache of losing a relationship that i worked so hard to maintain...losing so much more than that relationship...i've had to change the way i envision my future now."http://asongfortheday.blogspot.com/2007/11/so-i-went-to-ani-difranco-concert-in.html

Getting used to living a new life is how I am getting a little bit stronger everyday. I'm still angry that my plans were altered so abruptly and without my consent, but that is the way it goes sometimes. And when that happens it helps to have really good friends around, willing to be buffers, willing to take you out for a night on the town, and willing to just stay in and watch a movie. But friends aren't always going to be there and my therapist has a life besides handling my problems, so I have myself. And I actually really enjoy my own company. I took myself to Black Swan yesterday, first time going to a movie alone. And I really liked it. I didn't have to worry about if anyone else liked it, if they would eat the popcorn and junior mints, or thought it was too creepy...and I only had to pay for me. It's a lot cheaper to just date yourself. So even though I hear those songs and get sad thinking about what could have been, I keep telling myself it will be ok. And I think maybe, I am beginning to believe it.




Sarah Evans, A Little Bit Stronger

Woke up late today and I still feel the sting of the pain
But I brushed my teeth anyway
I got dressed through the mess and put a smile on my face
I got a little bit stronger

Riding in the car to work and I'm trying to ignore the hurt
So I turned on the radio, stupid song made me think of you
I listened to it for minute but I changed it
I'm getting a little bit stronger, just a little bit stronger

And I'm done hoping that we could work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days
I get a little bit stronger

Doesn't happen overnight but you turn around
And a month's gone by and you realize you haven't cried
I'm not giving you a hour or a second or another minute longer
I'm busy getting stronger


And I'm done hoping that we can work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking, that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days, I get a little bit stronger
I get a little bit stronger

Getting along without you, baby
I'm better off without you, baby
How does it feel without me, baby?
I'm getting stronger without you, baby

And I'm done hoping we could work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days
I get a little bit stronger

I get a little bit stronger
Just a little bit stronger
A little bit, a little bit, a little bit stronger
I get a little bit stronger